The Bi Apple: A Movie to Masturbate By

The Bi Apple is the tale of Simone Valentino, a young sex researcher who ventures to New York City to study a group of bisexuals who hang out in an apartment they call the fuckhouse.

This flick has it all: straight sex, pegging, boy-on-boy, girl-on-girl and other equally enticing combinations of the above.

After observing a few sweet and sweaty scenes our girl Simone can’t help being drawn into the fun and luckily superhot lesbian superheroine ReVay is available to ease her transition. Let the sex toys roll!

Well shot with an attractive, relaxed and culturally diverse cast The Bi Apple has a little something to make everyone smile – and then some!

The movie's official caption: New York Girls like Boys Doing Boys who like to do Girls. Well, I think we can all agree that they’re not the only ones! Five sizzling sex-scenes await your viewing pleasure.

Bisexual movies are something of a niche taste, and this one provides everything you could ask for from the genre — cute boys fondling and sucking each other in the bathroom while a hot girl watches and masturbates.

Guys taking it up the ass with strap-ons and cocks, a girl-girl scene with lots of toys, a three-way where the men are as interested in each other as they are in the woman involved, and so on.

There are some funny jokes, some weird non sequiturs, and some very odd moments (the mysterious lesbian with the cape and utility belt full of sex toys is among the oddest things you’re likely to see in a porn movie).

It all adds up to a quirky film that’s all about having fun with whoever’s handy, regardless of their gender or sex.

Being Pleasured While Watching "The Bi Apple"

Tuesday night C and I caught a public screening of Audacia Ray’s The Bi Apple. It is so rare to have the experience of watching a porn movie in public these days.

I was wishing I had a raincoat and a chair that leaned all the way back, because, friends, this movie is HOT!

I had another idea, however. I unzipped my jeans, grabbed C’s hand, and thrust it against my crotch.

His experienced fingers quickly found my clit, and with a quick glance at me to make sure I really meant it, he began to rub through my cotton underwear.

He didn’t have a lot of room to maneuver, but he got it just right. I was aware of the other people sitting around us, though fortunately no one was too close, and since a friend of mine was hosting the screening I didn’t want to make a spectacle.

I started this, and I wanted to finish it, so I had no choice but to be quiet, which, surprise surprise, is very difficult for me.

Clenching my thighs around C’s fingers and my lips and teeth together, I pushed back against his fingers in small, subtle movements.

The tightness of my jeans, C’s delicious fingers, and the texture of my panties helped bring me quickly to bursting, and of course the movie was providing full frontal stimulus.

I clenched the handles of my movie seat, writhed against C’s fingers, and tried to keep my head and shoulders still.

A thrilled shout was fighting its way up my throat, but I held it down, dominating myself into submission. Silently, I rode the wave of pleasure, bucking against C’s fingers, and then nodded to him that he could remove them.

I sat in my pleasantly damp panties, feeling the waves of warmth radiate up my body from my pussy, and watched the rest of the movie with a smile on my face.

I’ll admit it: as the screening of The Bi Apple at the Anthology Film Archives on last Tuesday approached, I became increasingly apprehensive.

This was partly because the screening was to occur on my first night back in NYC, on which I really wanted nothing more than to crawl into a hole with delivered eats, pajamas, my boyfriend and some teevee.

But more than that, it was because I was having a lot of doubt about the validity of showing The Bi Apple in the context of the Anthology Film Archives, and as part of their New Filmmakers series.

This movie house, although avant garde, is not a porno palace. And I, though technically a writer, producer, and director of a feature (most of the footage may be fucking, but it has a discernable plot), am a pornographer, not a lofty Filmmaker.

Feature or no, me as auteur or no, The Bi Apple was made to inspire masturbation - and instant gratification whenever possible.

Say what you want about porno and its place in the sociological gender and sexuality experiment of society, but I want people to have orgasms to my movie.

Porno is a valid form of film, but watched out of context (meaning: without your hands down your pants) it is pretty goddamn boring, and I mean that of pretty much any porno.

Like a total loser and jaded person who has seen this movie a trillion times, I cut out of the screening after listening to the star, Simone Valentino, read a dirty story and doing a bit of an introduction myself, so I didn’t get to experience the feel in the room while the movie was screening.

The scant reports I’ve gotten from the screening have been positive - some viewers were even very naughty, bucking social conventions like don’t touch your friend’s genitals in a respectable movie theater.

However, I’m still not convinced that its a grand idea to watch porno in a context not meant for masturbating, and though its a novelty to watch porn all civilized - like in an arthouse movie theater, I’m not sure that it’s liberating or important.

I’m beginning to see more and more of the valuable differences between public and private spaces, and while I definitely enjoy fucking with them, I do kind of think its pretending to put porno in the same category as theater-worthy narrative or experimental film.

tags: porn  movie  women  masturbation  clitoris  

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