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Sex & the Female Libido [Men Who Feel Inadequate]

posted Saturday, 19 January 2008

Let me tell you about my girlfriend

Her libido has become so supercharged

it hums when I'm around her

Most of the time this is great,

but now I'm now feeling inadequate

because suddenly it seems like I have

a decreased libido compared with hers

Sigmund Freud popularized the term and defined libido as the instinct energy or force, contained in what Freud called the id, the largely unconscious structure of the psyche.

Freud pointed out that these libidinal drives can conflict with the conventions of civilized behavior, represented in the psyche by the superego.

It is this need to conform to society and control the libido that leads to tension and disturbance in the individual, prompting the use of ego defenses to dissipate the psychic energy of these unmet and mostly unconscious needs into other forms.

Excessive use of ego defenses results in neurosis. A primary goal of psychoanalysis is to bring the drives of the id into consciousness, allowing them to be met directly and thus reducing the patient's reliance on ego defenses.

The Inadequate Male [4 Mens Health]

Men are hardwired to want sex more than women, right? I mean c'mon ... the female libido can't compete with ours right men?

Well ... let me tell you about my girlfriend.

It was that way up to about a year ago when her female libido became so supercharged it hums when I'm around her.

Most of the time this is great, but I'm starting to feel inadequate because suddenly it seems like I have a decreased libido compared with her and with my male sex drive lagging, I don't want sex as often as she does.

I needed to find out what in the heck was going on and how I could adjust to it.

Understanding The Female Libido

The idea that men want sex more than women falls under the category of urban legend.

Studies comparing men's and women's sex life tells us that male masturbation is more prevelant, men have more casual sexual partners and think sexual thoughts more frequently ... but none of these facts prove men are innately hardwired to want sex more than women.

What these tendencies do show are cultural distinctions: Men grow up feeling entitled to act upon their sex drive while women are encouraged to control themselves.

A woman following this will have a harder time tapping into her erotic potential. Now, add the hormonal differences between the sexes and it would be fair to say that women have a more unpredictable and cyclical sexual system.

In short ... under optimal conditions, women can be as randy - if not more so - than men. It's just that creating those conditions often takes a bit more coaxing from us guys.

Once I discovered this nugget of truth I realized something .... I must be doing something right!

That would explain why my girlfriends libido went into overdrive like a honda Civic on NOS.

The more of me she has, the more she wants.

Rather than feeling inadequate, I should be strutting like the chief rooster in the barnyard.

Of course, on the other hand, it could also mean my current significant other might simply be going through a "hot cycle" for no discernable reason at all, or perhaps I might need to consider male libido enhancement?

We all know that happens... right guys?

Maybe my desire will swell and surpass hers again ... or maybe we'll find a perfect rhythm.

One thing I have learned on this sexual quest is that relationships are, in part, ever-evolving lessons in swinging with the ebb and flow of sexual energy, and learning to - like the song says - get it while you can.

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1. Ray left...
Monday, 21 January 2008 10:23 pm

Muhammad is supposed to have said women have a higher sex drive than men, but because they are more modest they do not manifest it quite as openly as men.